Thursday, June 28, 2012

Day 292

Things can get so off track can't they?

Somehow I've managed to loose readers across the board on my blogs in the last 24 hours, and that's okay.  I have to learn that I'm not going to be able to cater to everyone.  Nor is everyone else going to be able to cater to my tastes.

The movie challenge is making feel like I'm underwater right now.  I literally have a stack of movies on the DVR that need to be watched in the next few days.  But there is just something nagging at me that is keeping me from picking a film and watching it.
I think it has something to do with the fact there are currently 3 weeks worth of wrestling that I need to catch up with online before they get removed.

My physio therapy schedule has been changed like four times this week.  And that's sort of knocking me for a loop. 

And the cake didn't turn out.   I've talked before about how your emotions will affect what you cook, and last night the tension here reflected in the food.  

When I started my main blog few years ago, it was for a variety of reasons.  One was because I was trying to shift my direction in life.  To get over the past.  
It didn't really work.  I'm finding myself right back into the thick of it again.

Things happen in cycles.  Time moves in endings and beginnings and then starts over. 

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Day 291

I blogged earlier today on my main blog about how I'm having some issues with my writing.
I've touched on this topic a few times in the past, doesn't seem to be improving much.

And with that said, I went looking around at some other artist's blogs for awhile tonight.  Many of them had the same thing to say, and that was they feel insecure about their work.  Some feel they have no talent, others feel that it's not worthy or that they really have no vision.

It's all pretty much the same issue.  The lack of feeling that you have something to really contribute to society, to have something to really say

Another common thing I've noticed in many of the blogs I've been reading, has been the idea that because of something that happened to them as kids, they have the issues now.
Yeah, been there, had that chat too.

My whole life I've wanted someone to feel proud of me and of what I've done.  Never got it.  Always got the opposite. Literally being told that no one was interested in what I have to say or anything I have done.

Here's the kicker, someone finally said they were proud of me for something.   Too bad it was the physio therapist saying he was proud of how far I've come in the last three weeks on my recovery. 
Isn't that terrible.   I mean it.  Something as horrible as my knee injury and that's the first time someone has said anything truly positive to me that I can remember.

I hope everyone who reads this has a chance to tell someone today that they are honestly proud of them and have someone tell you that they are proud of you too. And to mean it.

Sunday, June 24, 2012

Day 290


I know the difference between these variations of the word.   I just don't always proof read.   I wrote up two posts in the last 24 hours were I ended up mixing up  Their and They're.  Was hours before I spotted it.

I'm also one of those people who can not concentrate if there is even the slightest bit of noise.  I've found that every time I sit down to type anything, even this right now; my mother will start to make noise.  She chooses that moment to talk to me, or mumble off key to something on the radio, or read someone's status out loud on Facebook.
And the second I stop typing, dead silence.

I remember why I moved out all those years ago.  I truly hope I am never in this sort of situation ever again.  And I also hope, that the second surgery goes smooth, and that I'm able to get to my own place within a few days of it.
Yes, I'm still waiting for the surgeon to get back from vacation so that he can book my surgery.

Who would ever thought I would miss something as mundane as a Thesaurus.  I was working on a post few hours ago and realized I'd used the word  "believe"  nearly 8 times in one paragraph.  

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Day 289

The big craze right now in scrapbooks are the Smash journals.  I got one there few weeks back, and have only used half of it, but already I'm looking to get another. 
It's the hybrid of scrapbooking and keeping a journal.  

This is the style of scrapping that I've been doing my whole life, it just has a name now.  Cool, I was a legend in my own lunchtime.
The only thing is, and this is where my pudding brain zombieness took over, I picked the style of Smash book because of how nice the pictured-designed pages were.   Now, I'm not wanting to cover the scrapbook pages with my stuff.  Sort of defeats the purpose of the thing. 

So, my next one will be just random and I won't even look at the style of pages until after I get it home. 

So you might be thinking, why on this lovely rainy day, an I mumbling about this art project?  Cause I am, I can and there is nothing else really to do right now.   That, and because of a major thunder storm last night which caused a power out here,  I didn't get to watch a movie last night.  So I'm a day behind on my movie challenge.
But, because of it, I ended up working on my scrapbooking by flashlight.  Now, if I could just figure out how to take photos with this PC's webcam... I so can not wait till I can afford a MAC again!

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Day 288

Been a few days.  
I posted the movie de jour.  Day 191
I had some issues yesterday, and didn't get a chance to post on there yesterday.   Didn't get much of a chance to be online at all yesterday.

I'm searching for recipes that are connected to movies.  Starting with popcorn recipes.  Everything I've found so far have been for flavoured popcorn, but that's not really what I am looking for. 

Have a good Sunday everyone.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

day 287

The most overused word in the world right now = mancave.
I hate that term.  What the hell was wrong with den, or rec room? 
Been stuck watching way too many of those house hunting shows on HGTV, and I really hope that a new term is brought into play in regards to that term.

We went from a heat wave here to nearly a freeze out in the last two days. 

Surprisingly, I'm liking that new show Dogs in the City.  I didn't think it would fly, but it does.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Day 286

Wow, things really change in two years don't they?
I was just going through an old blog from 2010.  There were not even a full ten posts on that blog, the topic was my novel. 

I can't believe how things have changed in that time.  I can't get over how excited I was when all that was happening in my life. 
Then things happened and stuff got derailed. 

I'm not the same person I was when I was working on that blog/novel.  I don't know if you can say that I grew up, but I did grow.  Changed maybe is more like it.  When I read over stuff I wrote just a few short years ago, even a few months ago, even I don't recognize me.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Day 285

If you've checked out the movie de jour over on the movie challenge blog, then you might want to go back to see the Top 5 Male Heartthrobs, which I just added.   Day 185.

We hit a horrible +30 degrees c, today with a humidex of +34 degrees c.    That's just way too much for me to handle.

It was one of those nights when ramen noodles were the perfect thing to make for supper because it didn't involve having to turn the oven on.  Just two minutes at the stove stirring and dinner.

Friday, June 8, 2012


The movie de jour is up.  Day 183  I was late today with it.

Not much going on around here today, we had another day of nothing but thunderstorms.
Seriously, not much happening around here today.  Wasn't sure I was going to even post on here, but thought I should.

Just saw the commercial for the movie "Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter"  and I have to see this movie.  Let's just hope that my surgery is either before that week or after, given that movies in this city are never out for more then a few days.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Day 283

Back in 2006, I had been in a brutal car accident.  I spent a few months in hospital because of it.  While I was there, one of my roommates had been recovering from surgery to both her legs. And one night, she said to me that I was killing her happiness. 
I didn't get it at the time.  Now, I do.

Positive thinking. It's one of the best healing tools we have.
The past week and a half, I've had more progress with my knee... as in a faster progress. Which if you've been reading this blog with any regularity you would know the first two months of this injury were hell. Slow, painful and just a total emotional wrecking  ball.

The last week and a half, something's shifted. 
Emotionally I mean.   I was in a great mood just a half hour ago, listening to some Alice Cooper online feeling normal for the first time since all this happened.    Then this round of deep sighs came from my mother across the kitchen table.  Like the whole world was evil, and it disrupted my good mood for a few minutes.
But only for a few minutes, cause once I realized that her bad mood was rippling out, I just ignored her.

We don't always think about how we are affecting others with our actions and words or even our emotions.  
I know, I've touched on this topic - the idea of vibrations - before on other spots on the internet; but today I'm really seeing the proof.

Its like when you set a goal for yourself and can picture it crystal clear in your mind, you feel like you've already reached it even when you still have only made a few small steps towards it.  Still, you find yourself reaching your goal smoothly and quickly.
Call it what you will, positive thinking, or manifestation, or the rules of attraction or whatever.  Just know that what you put out will ripple into the lives of others.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

282 night time

It's been one of those days where I'm feeling off kilter.   Been going around in circles on the internet in the same four or so sites.
Feel like I'm almost waiting for something, though I couldn't tell you what that is.  Like a message or something.  Ooohh, am I going to receive a love letter? 
Here's hoping.

Seems I'm the latest thing on a bunch of "super hits" lists.  And I never signed up for any of them. But yet, I'm getting crazy hits from these places.  Not sure how to react to that.

Decided to do some Jane Austen movies this week for the movie challenge
Seriously, I don't know if I can take another month living with my mother.  I remember now why I moved out all those years ago.  I'm really hoping that the hospital calls me this week to schedule the second surgery.
As much as I want to find the right man and be married, I have to admit I love living alone.  I miss living alone. I miss my own living room, miss my own bedroom.  Hate sharing a bathroom just hate it.

Down to one crutch most of the time.  I know I'll most likely be back up to two for a few days after the surgery. 

Okay, this blog post was the equivalent of me blowing off extra energy.  I'm just needing to talk to someone other then my mom.
Any wrestlers  out there?

Day 282

Really starting to hate computers in general. I just spent the last 4 hours trying to get as much of my stuff from my MAC as I could.  I got less then half of it actually before running out of jumpdrives
and now I find that all my photos minus a small handful, are not compatible with the PC.
My screen captures and all my photos are in JPEG2 and JPEG, where as my *new PC* only takes TIFF.  I think I have maybe 20 out of over 1000 photos that are in TIFF format.
I want to scream.  Don't even get me started on my videos and the old TNA episodes that I had bought from iTunes Canada before they stopped carrying the show. 

You know, I was always so careful to back up my writing, but never thought about the iTunes and iPhotos not being compatible. And my productions.  All the videos I created...

There is a big lesson here but I'm too tired tonight to consider what it might be.

Friday, June 1, 2012


Friday night.  Sitting here watching wrestling, WWE.  Thinking that just another few weeks and I'll be able to get back to my own apartment. 
It just makes sense now to wait till after this second surgery that I'll have some time in the next month. And then I'll have three scars on the knee and not just the one large one that goes from the middle of the thigh to the middle of my shin.

Wrestling. I love it and I hate it. It's like that one relationship that you keep coming back to every so often because your history is so deep.